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Jokes

Top 10 Chemistry Jokes With Chemist Dog

1. What kind of dogs do chemists have? Laboratory retrievers.

What kind of dogs do chemists

2. During the chemistry exam, my friend asked me whether I had some sodium hypobromite. I told him, “NaBro.”

During the chemistry exam, my

3. Chemists have a provocative nature. They hate neutral people and catalyze a situation to get good reactions.

Chemists have a provocative nature

4. Which compound smells the worst? Iron chloride – it’s fecl matter!

Which compound smells the worst

5. Why are chemists great for solving problems? They have all the solutions.

Why are chemists great for solving problems? They have all the solutions.

6. You’re too angry! Go molecule off.

You're too angry! Go molecule off.

7. What is a chemist’s favorite holiday song? Oh chemist-tree Oh chemist-tree!

What is a chemist’s favorite holiday song?

8. Anyone know any jokes about sodium? NA

Anyone know any jokes about sodium?

9. Organic chemistry is difficult. People who study ithave alkynes of trouble.

Organic chemistry is difficult. People who study it have alkynes of trouble.

10. My chemistry experiment exploded. It’s ok, oxidants happen.

My chemistry experiment exploded. It’s ok, oxidants happen.
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Jokes

Top 10 Chemistry Jokes With Chemist Cat

1. Noble gases are the most carefree gases. They just don’t care to react to what others do!

Noble gases are the most carefree

2. Why do chemists enjoy working with ammonia? Because it’s pretty basic stuff.

Why Do Chemists Enjoy Working With Ammonia?

3. Oxygen wanted to be knighted but he wasn’t noble.

Oxygen Wanted To Be Knighted

4. Tell me a potassium joke. K

Tell Me A Potassium Joke

5. What do you get when you cut an avocado into 6×10^23 pieces?

What Do You Get When You Cut An Avocado Into 6X10^23 Pieces?

6. The lab smells like rotten eggs you say? Sorry to hear about your sulfuring.

The Lab Smells Like Rotten Eggs You Say?

7. Yo’ mamma so ugly not even fluorine would bond with her.

Yo’ Mamma So Ugly

8. Last night, a hypnotist convinced me I was a soft, malleable metal with an atomic number of 82. I am easily lead.

Last Night, A Hypnotist Convinced Me I Was A Soft, Malleable Metal With An Atomic Number Of 82

9. What is the show cesium and iodine love watching together? CSI

What Is The Show Cesium And Iodine Love Watching Together?

10. What was avogadros’s favorite sport? Golf – because he always got a mole-in-one.

What Was Avogadro’s Favorite Sport

11. Two blood cells met and fell in love. Alas, it was all in vein.

Tow blood cells met and fell in LOVE. Alas, it was all in vein.

12. What do you call a nonsensical felon? A silicon.

What do you call a nonsensical felon?

13. When life gives you mold make pencillin.

When life gives you mold, make penicillin

14. Why is the PH of YouTube very stable? Because it constantly buffers.

Why is the PH of Youtube very stable? Because it constantly buffers

15. Why did the germ cross the microscope? To get to the other slide.

Why did the germ cross the microscope
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Jokes

Top 5 Chemistry Jokes About Alcohol

1. Why did the father alcohol name his two sons, ethanol and methanol? So that they both can always remain as chemical brothers!

Why did the father alcohol name

2. Once, an organometallic compound went to a bar, and after a few drinks he got epoxicated.

Once, an organometallic

3. Believe it or not, alcohols are homogeneous solutions, but it would be better if you don’t mix them up!

Believe it or not, alcohols are

4. A neutron walks into a bar and asks the bartender how much for a drink. For you, no charge.

A neutron walks into a bar and asks the bartender how much for a drink. For you, no charge

5. Chemists and alcoholics have one thing in common, and that is they both view alcohol as part of the solution.

Chemists and alcoholics have one
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Top 8 Chemistry Jokes About Family

1. Florence Flask was getting ready for the opera. All of a sudden, she screamed: “Erlenmeyer, my joules! Somebody has stolen my joules!” The husband replied, “Calm down, honey. We’ll find a solution.”

Florence Flask was getting ready

2. The little atom was a naughty boy who kept shouting at his little brother. So the father atom scolded him by saying “You should never shout atom of your voice like that.”

The little atom was a naughty boy

3. My wife is a scientist whose hobby is to take photographs. She clicks wonderful photons!

My wife is a scientist whose

4. Why did the father alcohol name his two sons, ethanol and methanol? So that they both can always remain as chemical brothers!

Why did the father alcohol name

5. When I asked my mother why my father was coming home late from work recently, she replied that he was under a lot of pressure lately at the mines.

When I asked my mother why my

6. My son is extremely naughty and always up to some sort of mischief. Angrily I told gim, “I’m keeping my ion you.”

My son is extremely naughty and

7. The chemist was angry at his son and said, “Never put your neon the dining table.”

The chemist was angry at his son

8. The best thing about chemistry is, it is like a family. Everyone is well bonded with one another!

The best thing about chemistry is
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Jokes

Top 15 Chemistry Jokes About Chemists

1. Why do chemists call Helium, Barium and Curium the medical elements? Because if you can’t Helium or Curium, you Barium!

Why do chemists call helium

2. What does a chemist call the condition of having dry eyes? Ophthalmic anhydride.

What does a chemist call the

3. How often does a chemist need coffee? They need caffeine periodically.

How often does a chemist need

4. Why do chemists like nitrates so much? They are cheaper than day rates.

Why do chemists like nitrates so

5. The Japanese chemist’s favorite element when he was a kid was Manga-nese.

The Japanese chemist's favorite

6. The chemist did not want to publish his cringy chemistry joke on Facebook as he thought he would get a volatile reaction.

The chemist did not want to

7. Chemists favor nitrates because they are way more affordable than the day rates.

Chemists favor nitrates because

8. A plant owned by a chemist grows into being a chemist’s tree.

A plant owned by a chemist

9. The chemist was very sad. Although he was good at cooking compounds, unfortunately, he could never taste what he cooked!

The chemist was very sad.

10. The only rodent which a chemist absolutely adores is moles!

The only rodent which a chemist

11. When the vacation plan got canceled, the sad chemist said, “without anion everything are bond to go wrong.”

When the vacation plan got

12. For a chemist, the most important element is the element of surprise!

For a chemist, the most important

13. Chemists have a provocative nature. They hate neutral people and catalyze a situation to get good reactions.

Chemists have a provocative nature

14. Why didn’t the chemist enjoy doing chromatography? He got separation anxiety.

Why didn't the chemist enjoy doing chromatography?

15. How can you spot a chemist in the bathroom? They wash their hands before they use the toilet.

How can you spot a chemist in the bathroom?

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Jokes

Top 5 Chemistry Jokes About Food

1. What ionic compound goes great with cheese? Sodium acetate

What ionic compound goes great

2. Why does a hamburger have less energy than steak? Because it’s in the ground state!

Why does a hamburger have less

3. The chemist who specializes in making soda. Is called a fizzy-cist.

The chemist who specializes in

4. What is the chemical formula for banana? BaNa2

5. When life gives you C6H8O7 make H2O+C12H22O11+C6H8O7.

When Life Gives You C6H8O7
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Top 10 Chemistry Jokes About School

1. With the chemistry exam coming, my proffesor told me that I needed to molecule my head.

With the chemistry exam coming,

2. The chemistry professor couldn’t see what was inside the beaker as it was Mt (Meitnerium).

The chemistry professor couldn't

3. The entire class decided to bunk the chemistry class. But owning to low attendance, I couldn’t afford to mass it!

The entire class decided to bunk

4. During the chemistry exam, my friend asked me whether I had some sodium hypobromite. I told him, “NaBro.”

During the chemistry exam, my

5. The number of students in my chemistry class is tin.

The number of students in my

6. After the fight ensued between the two students on who would win the platinum prize for the chemistry quiz, the quizmaster commented that this was petty. The chemistry teacher corrected him and said, “No, it is PT.”

After the fight ensued between

7. The new student who joined our class said, “I was forced to choose chemistry as the other subjects Argon.”

The new student who joined our

8. The chemistry teacher explained to us that boyle’s law is the product of volume and pressure because volume won’t work under pressure.

The chemistry teacher explained

9. The class was very roundy, and as a result, the chemistry teacher lost her mole-cule!

The class was very rowdy

10. Chemistry teachers everywhere like to talk about Ammonia while introducing students to chemistry because it is base-ic stuff.

Chemistry teachers everywhere
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Jokes

Top 10 Romantic Chemistry Jokes

1. My bright chemist brother received his wedding photons quite late.

My bright chemist brother

2. Are you full of Beryllium, Gold, and Titanium? Because you are beautiful.

Are you full of beryllium, gold,

3. When proton that opposite charges attract each other, he went to electron and told, “I am positively attracted to you.”

When proton that opposite

4. I heard that the first date with Potassium that Oxygen went to turned out fine. The second time, that Oxygen went on a date with Potassium was ok2.

I heard that the first date with

5. When Magnesium saw Oxygen, he said, “I was sure there was some chemical reaction between you and me.”

“Omg I was right!”

When Magnesium saw Oxygen, he

6. Love is in the air? Wrong. Nitrogen, Oxygen and Carbon Dioxide are in the air.

Love Is In The Air?

7. Be my covalentine.

be my covalentine

8. While having a conversation, the mass spectrometry conveyed his condolences to the gas chromatograph by saying that breaking up is hard.

While having a conversation

9. Chlorine came to sodium and told her, “You complete me!”

Chlorine came to sodium and told

10. This is a salt.

this is a salt
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Jokes

Top 7 Chemistry Pick Up Line Jokes

1. Are you full of beryllium, gold, and titanium? Because you are beauti-full.

Are you full of beryllium, gold,

2. Let’s get physics-cal.

Let’s get PHYSICS-cal

3. Marie, you’re looking more radiant every day.

Marie, you're looking more radiant every day

4. I wish I was adenine. Then I could get paired with U.

I wish I was adenine. Then I could get paired with U.

5. Girl, you’re like a salt; You raise my boiling point.

Chemistry pick up line salt

6. You must be a compound of berylium and barium because you’re a total BaBe.

You Must Be A Compound Of Beryllium And Barium

7. Hey girl, are you made of copper and tellurium? Because you’re CuTe.

Hey Girl, Are You Made Of Copper And Tellurium?
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What element is a girl’s future best friend?

Carbon

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Jokes

Why do chemists call helium, barium, and curium the medical elements?

Because if you can’t helium or curium, you barium!

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Jokes

Photons have mass? I didn’t know they were catholic!